The Perils of Orthogluttony

I am so sorry to post this, but I could simply not leave it by the wayside; and I confess I gained at least 8 lb.s over the holidays:

I, for one, am far more concerned about the number of gluttonous priests that are being married, because gluttony is a mortal sin and more than 30% of the population is eating itself to death and yet less than 5% of the population is homosexual, but we let fat people get married and have babies and adopt babies and no one cares so why is homosexuality getting everyone’s attention when obesity and gluttony are far more pervasive? What kind of Biblical fidelity is this, anyways? I’ve met too many orthogluttons, I guess that’s it. And the orthogluttons tend to not be too well informed historically, but they believe the Bible when it is against gay sex, but not against gluttony apparently. So they trumpet the Bible and sexual morality as the sine qua non of orthodoxy, even as they eat and eat and eat…